PDA

View Full Version : Confidence! - a rant


Dr. P-Evil
11th October 2010, 07:18 PM
I had an itch to write, so here it is.

Confidence is so fragile, not because of it's make up, but in who's hands we put it in. An egg in my hand is much safer than an egg in the hand of a 3 year old.

this post goes out to anyone who wishes they had more confidence, but gets stuck.

1. you have an ability to forgive and understand others, why not yourself? you like flawed people, you need to like yourself and give yourself the same fair treatment.

2. go after what you want in life. talk yourself into why you should be doing something rather than talking yourself out. why? see #3

3. if you can't predict the incredibly bad things in life, you can't predict the incredibly good things either. just live and see what happens.

4. bottom line, you define your worth. rejection is a part of life, not all 6 billion people on this planet can dig you. once you take the power of success and failure to define your identity, then you are free. if you let other people hold your confidence, of course it's gonna break.

5. i have always struggled with the idea that confidence leads to cockiness and that leads to being a douche bag and somehow 'keeping it real' is some sort of virtue. that's like clipping an eagle's wings because you don't want it to burn up in the sun if it flys too high. that's laziness in responding to feedback from failure and not learning from it. if you get lazy, then yes you will be a douche bag. however, even if you are a douche, then see #1 - douche bags are forgiven all the time.

6. hakuna matata- what's in the past is in the past, so don't worry about it. look for ways to learn from your past rather than carrying it on your back.

starting a new job where i will be doing some major cold calling in the beginning, so i write myself a note that pyschs me up before calls and gets me to a higher energy level of ' fuck it, let's see what happens!'. so that is the genesis of this post.

w3
11th October 2010, 08:17 PM
Couldn't agree more.

Like I've said in my older rants, confidence doesn't come from penis size, or good looks, or money.

It's a state of mind.
And it's up to you, and only you, to make that shit happen.

You are your own worst enemy.
Old wisdom like that is usually oh so right.

Always glad to see people find the correct path.
All the best to you Dr. P-Evil, and all you other fuckers reading this.

The_Scientist
12th October 2010, 04:26 AM
I like it.

I have to remind myself of this frequently. I say it like this : Don't try to not do bad. Try to do good.

zeolite
12th October 2010, 09:38 PM
It's posts like this that keep me coming back to CC :D

Great post Dr. P-Evil! It took me a long time to realise that stuff would only happen in my life if I made it. Slightly off topic, but your post reminded me of that old motto in marketing: a terrible thing happens if you don't advertise - nothing.

Dr. P-Evil
13th October 2010, 05:09 PM
glad it is well received. this is an entry into my dream job, but it requires developing relationships as it's a commission based thing. at first, i told myself if i fail, i fail. i have three months probation and i intend on enjoying every moment by remembering i get to do my dream job today.

and then i started trying to develop a targeted washed down list of people i can contact when i start, and panic came in...working harder, i felt like i was in quick sand because the harder i work at finding people, the more desperate and hopeless i felt......feel like i need a list of 5000 people to get just one sale...pysching myself out by assuming it's going to be very tough.

but then i go back to my note card and keep repeating positive affirmations
to get me back to a battle ready state of mind...fearless!

though, my nature would be to not sleep for the next 3 months while i put everything i have into it, being miserable and fearing failure....i am taking the courageous step of letting go. i won't sacrifice normal sleep, exercise, and time with my friends. i will work a respectable 65 hour work week. if it's meant to be it, it's meant to be. never can underestimate the power of luck and carry no expectations except to enjoy every moment of it.

zeolite
16th October 2010, 07:39 PM
i will work a respectable 65 hour work week.That is respectable. But it also sounds like you're gonna be left with enough time for yourself.

Dr. P-Evil
19th October 2010, 05:20 AM
That is respectable. But it also sounds like you're gonna be left with enough time for yourself.

did u mean not enough time for myself? in order to make it, i'm going to have to show i want to be there more than they want me there. last year, i was putting in 80 plus hours per week...and it broke me.

The Big Banana
19th October 2010, 11:54 AM
My nearly 8 years working for fortune 500 company has taught me one thing. The more hours you work in a week, the more hours they expect you to work. Start off slow.



//OK hopefully its taught me more than one thing...

Tiger_Penis
24th October 2010, 06:28 PM
Right on brother!

I was down in the dumps a while ago and this didn't turn me around but it summed up how I felt.

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/yX39J_YyKbs?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/yX39J_YyKbs?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

Dr. P-Evil
6th November 2010, 08:02 AM
TP, fantastic clip.

as an over-thinker, i am learning to shut my brain off. whenever i interact with people, i assume that

Axlerod
6th November 2010, 02:29 PM
Maybe a good thing to bear in mind with the cold calling, Dr P:

Lots of calls are going to lead to rejection, but they are not rejecting YOU, they are rejecting that phone call.

When you think of it like that it would be crazy to let that kind of rejection affect you personally, or your self worth or self image.

Now this doesn't mean don't worry about it. They are rejecting THAT CALL. So this means it's up to you to improve your calls - what you say, how you say it, etc. But all "rejections" are just feedback to help you improve these things. There's no failure, only opportunities to learn.

'RockHard'RickReno
10th November 2010, 04:16 PM
i was putting in 80 plus hours per week...and it broke me.

Holy shit, no doubt. Just hearing that makes me want to run and find a rock to hide under. I complain about working a four hour shift. Heck, I complain about putting out a resume or even thinking about getting a job. [Hench why I'm in college and adding to an enormous loan debt :icon_rolleyes:].

Sixty-Five hours is still insane, yet like you're saying, if you are motivated to do it it should be a breeze. And you can't burn yourself out by expecting every day to be the greatest. I often do that instead of just giving myself the space to have a frown here or there if it's necessary.