Chat up lines...

[Shane_Bos]

Any type of chat up lines you can think of. Post away.

[Shane_Bos]

Are you gay? (No.) Wow, me neither, let's have sex

I'm like Domino's Pizza. If I don't cum in 30 minutes, the next one is free.

I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.

Hey baby, wanna go halves on a bastard? (bit harsh but kinda funny)

Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!

Can you lick your nipples? [Any answer] Can I?

[JB22]

im not sure if I should laugh....or stay far far away from you...you creep :?

[Shane_Bos]

Id like to take this opportunity to say i dont actually use these chat up lines. Or any for that matter. I usualy start with something along the lines of 'hello'. I dont know anyone that uses chat up lines seriously. I just think theyre funny :lol:

[JB22]

I have this friend who uses lines like that all the time...and all of his guy friends think he's pathetic and stupid when he hits on girls....but for some reason, women seem to fall for it :? :x :x :cry: :cry:

[Shane_Bos]

Maybe they think hes slightly mentally disabled to actually use lines like that and take pity in him.

[ArTee63]

How about....

Do you wash your jeans in Windex cause I can see myself in them.

Are you free tonight or will it cost me?

Do you know the difference between a hamburger and a blow job? No! D'ya wanna do lunch?

That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

If I told you that you had a nice body would you hold it against me?

[JB22]

Hi, I'm (your name here). Wanna fuck?

[Ed]

I have this friend who uses lines like that all the time...and all of his guy friends think he's pathetic and stupid when he hits on girls....but for some reason, women seem to fall for it :? :x :x :cry: :cry:

There, my friend, is one of the mysteries of the universe! Women like creeps for lovers and nice guys for friends. It must be evolutionary or something. Maybe all the bastard guys pushed the nice guys into the path of the charging sabre tooth tigers, thereby ensuring their survival and the origin of the expression: Nice guys finish last :?

[Matt]

90% of the chat ups in this thread are GOLD! :lol: :lol: :lol:

(if only for comedy effect)

[Baseballer8]

When they are drunk enough asking to shit on them will allow you to score if you say it seductively enough :twisted:

[ArTee63]

That's the second Cleveland Steamer reference in as many days. :?

[Baseballer8]

Artee its more popular than you think everybody is doin it :mrgreen :puke: yuck!!!

[JB22]

well...if everyones doing it... :wink:

[BEAST]

When they are drunk enough asking to shit on them will allow you to score if you say it seductively enough :twisted:

Too true, its all in the delivery and a little smile seems to work well :lol:

[wern]

Heres one that works a charm:


walk up to a chick in any situation, tpa them on the shoulder and when you have their attention stare at them very seriously for 3 whole seconds, then say

(Look chick in the eyes with a serious expression, maybe a hint of a smile, but not actually smiling. Talk slowly:)

Hi.... (pause)
Can I ask you a question?.... (pause)
You have the nicest pair of (and start to look downwards towards her chest) shoes I have seen all night (look at shoes, then up at her seriously).
Where did you get them?

Ice has been broken, proceed with confidence.

If you try to pick a women up they have an automatic defence system for it with radars and the whole shabbang. corny pickups succeed SOMETIMES and only with extremely drunk chicks who you wont get much out of anyways unless they are a slut.

[Beefeater]

Haha, I'll try that one wern. But I think I'll wear a hockey mask.

[wern]

no probs. its a good line, of course it is nothing by itself. You gotta look and smell nice and give her a james bond type squinting stare. oh yeah.

the easiest place to pick chicks up is at a mall. This one time I went into a chemist and said something in a similar way to a chick that i was asking about medication to. She was this cute brazilian. We had a quick 5min chat. The next time I came into that chemist she took a business card and wrote her email and number on it and told me to email her. She was 10cm(4 inches) taller than me. Ahh memories.

[MagnumXL]

"i do penis enlargement, wanna see?"

[wern]

"i do penis enlargement, wanna see?"

:lol:

Their response would be a kodak moment

[BigBadBear]

"i do penis enlargement, wanna see?"
Haha! Excellent stuff Magnum! :lol: