"I havnt got the heart to tell you"

[Jelqster]

I had sex in a car the other day, and my girlfriend was enjoying it and telling me not to stop and making a bunch of noise, she was sitting on the passenger seat which was declined back completely and i was kneeling in front of her, fucking her. But the thing is, she then made me stop after i changed positions because it got uncomfortable and she got a bit dry. (i dunno why? is it because shes moving positions that she gets dry?)

So then she just finished me off.

Later in the day we talked about it and i asked hwy she was uncomfortable, and she said she got dry and the position wasnt good for her just uncomfortable unlike the first position. I said she should have told me and we could have changed back and she said:


"I havnt got the heart to tell you"


Dam thats a kick in the bollocks, what ELSE hasnt she got the heart to tell me? Maybe im shit in bed but she hasnt got the heart to tell me.... im sure this isnt the case, when i go down on her its much MUCH more pleasureable fo her then sex. This is a bit shit haha.

Views?

[PepeLePew]

Going down on a chick and stimulating her clit is almost always more
pleasing for them then just sexual intercourse. Most girls can only orgasm
from clitoral stimulation, so stick with lots of oral...if you're fucking her
take a minute or 2 break from fucking her and give her some oral sex again,
don't be afraid of your man juice. Basically, try to make sure she is extremely
eroused...wet, go down on her as much as you can before the intercourse
and mid-and-end intercourse. And make sure you are using some lube to
also help fit the dryness.

That's all I got for now, it's late and I'm not thinking too clearly. Hope that
helps a little.

And her saying that little "I haven't got the heart to tell you," well now
you are probably going to be thinking what she means until you find out.
I say forget about it and if it happens again and you ask why and you
gives an answer like that then try to discuss it with her, tell there is
nothing that she could tell you that you couldn't handle.

Personally, I just think she really isn't a sex loving person. She is just doing
it to please you? I may be wrong, but from reading all your posts it could
be true. So it's not you...it's her. Something you just got to deal with
and not really bother thinking to much about.

[Torpedo]

Yeah, that could be the case. but I think ya'll need to sit down and talk about it. Make sure that she knows that you'd rather have her be 100% honest with you than lie to you to spare your feelings. You think that any relationship will only survive if it's built on honesty, and blah blah blah. However you want to approach it. You do need to nip it in the bud, though.

[w3]

Jelqster,
Here we are again.
And I'm telling you this as simply as I can, without being too sensitive.
GROW A PAIR.

I mean, you are way too insecure.

If we humans have some sort of 'auras' surrounding us, isn't that negative confidence going to affect her on some level, maybe even making her not be able to climax.
Or maybe it is just visible in your behaviour, body languange etc.

Secondly, Grow a pair in a sense that you seem very unhappy in your relationship, I think you really need to think hard and long about continuing your relationship with her. When you finally move in to her country, weight things around.

If she isn't telling you everything, she is a fucking introverted bitch.
I have experience on this field, and let me tell you, it isn't worth it.
She need to grow up to be able to talk about EVERYTHING.
And you need to grow a pair to be able to do the RIGHT and MANLY thing and just fucking dump the bitch.

And in the end she might be okay with not cumming, if she has never cum before, she doesn't know what to expect, so she might get the "full feel" just from sex alone.
That might change when she ages, and her bodily functions mature. But if you are having sex nonetheless, why the fuck bother?

If she loves you and you love her, why let this bother yourself too much.

Love's a bitch ain't it?
Now slap yourself once or twice in order to get the desired effect of my lecture.

[Jelqster]

good points by all, I think one of the main reasons she has sex IS for me without a doubt. Becuase i enjoy it. I think she enjoys the fact that i enjoy it aswell.

She loved when i go down on her tho. a fucking lot. As she told me im very good at it. Its just sex is almost like shes completely doing it for me...

what should i do? Avoid having sex with her until she gets urgeS? or just go down on her and tease her with my dick but never fuck her

what ecactly?

[PepeLePew]

No, keep fucking. Just don't think and worry about it so much. You're doing
about all you can. I haven't heard you mention anything recently about
the vibrator you got her...what's the deal with that...she using it?

You're worrying about things too much...she is who she is, can't really
change her anymore...keep trying to and you'll just further drive yourself
crazy.

[Torpedo]

good points by all, I think one of the main reasons she has sex IS for me without a doubt. Becuase i enjoy it. I think she enjoys the fact that i enjoy it aswell.

That could be why she's not enjoying it. She sees it as some duty that she needs to perform to keep you happy. She doesn't even WANT to enjoy it.

I still think that you need to have a heart-to-heart talk with her about this. Do it someplace that's private, relaxed, and maybe even a little romantic. Girls don't want weenies, but they do want guys that are sensitive to their needs. It is YOUR job as the man to initiate this conversation.

Tell her that you want sex to be something special that the two of you can share together. Tell her that you can't enjoy it if she's not enjoying it, because you love her. Tell her that you want to know how she feels and what she's thinking and that there's nothing that she can't tell you. Let her know that you want her to be completely honest about what she likes and doesn't like, because if she's faking it, then the whole thing is meaningless. I dunno, say it however you want. But be sure to speak her language and be sensitive to how she's feeling in all of this. She will probably welcome the invitation to be more open with you, and it'll make her feel good to know that you care about her so much that you're willing to stop worrying about your own pleasure to focus on hers. For her to enjoy sex, she needs to feel closer to you emotionally. It's probably the key to her orgasm issue.

It's a shame that no one seems to value communication around here. It really is the only way to an honest, sincere, loving relationship. Or is everybody just in it for the sex these days? :icon_rolleyes:

[Torpedo]

Oh, and if anyone uses this advice to manipulate girls in any way, they will be hunted down and destroyed. :mrgreen

[w3]

Good advice guys.
And I must further underline the fact that you need to stop worrying about things too much.
That will in turn eventually mirror in other parts of your life, and you become a depressed lil motherfucker.

Live a little, stop worrying about things too much.
When you finally realize this, that is when you feel enlightened.

As Pepe said, she is who she is. Only time will change her, or even time might not?
It's a gamble, either you stay and see the cards you've been dealt, or you fold.

I for one have noticed that seeing the cards and playing them will make you stronger, because being depressed and a fucking mess can make you into so much more.
But dont get caught dwelling in all that, you need to know when to give up.
If you don't, you'll end up old and bitter.

I've had my share of women, I've had my share of STD's.
I've also fallen head over heels in love, and been hurt so badly, been down at the bottom so deep I never thought anyone could ever go any deeper.
Guess what, I went deeper after each time.
And I came back stronger, and wiser. Knowing what not to do.

What you need to realize, is that love hurts, everything hurts.
Just don't let it keep you down, even if life gives you the whip, just stand back up again, no matter how much it hurts and ask for more.

One day you'll be like fucking Gandhi.

But then again, as I've stated so many times before;
You can't learn life by reading a book, or listening to someone's advice.
You have to make your own mistakes.

Even though CC is a great outlet, and there are great people here to advice you.
In the end, it's still you that's gotta make all the mistakes in order to learn from them. So stop worrying about it, stop asking about how you should deal with these things and just go on and be brave and make the mistakes!

That's just human nature.