Wern's diary

[wern]

Taken from old forum:

Hi guys,
I'm a new member here and have been reading the posts on these forums for a good part of the day today (my first day here).

I hope in time I can use my experiences to help contribute to others' in these forums.

Starting stats (March 2005):
EBPL - 6.5
EG - midshaft - 4.7
EG - base - 4.65

April 2005
EBPL - 6.75
EG - midshaft - 4.75

May 2005
EBPL - 6.9
EG - midshaft - 4.75

June 2005
EBPL - 6.9
EG - midshaft - 4.75

my main goal is to add an inch to girth as well as length. I would be very happy with an 8incher (wouldn't we all) and considering I am only 1.5 Inch away from it, it doesn't seem too out there. I hope I succeed. I wish everyone on these forums the best of luck in achieving their PE goals.

I have changed my technique a few times so for techniques at various stages, just refer to my posts in this thread

Old Technique (as per request):
1. hot wrap + 150 kegels (5min)
2. light stretching + godma's helicopter - (forward, left, right, up), 15sec, 20sec, then 25sec, slaps in between each set
3. circulation encouragement (slapping penis against leg) (1min)
4. Hold 15 sec 80%
5. 100 Dry Jelqs, light to medium intensity 60%


6. 3 sets of:a. Hold 30 sec 90-100%


b. 130 wet jelqs
Total of about 400 wet jelqs

7. 10min shower: stretches + warm down + kegels (up to 100)



I think this is actually a quick exercise because:
1 is done during brushing teeth and shaving
5 is integrated into the showering
so the whole exercise takes an extra 10-15mins out of my day.

[wern]

I am now in 2nd week. My routine has gotten a lot more complex, but I don't think it's much more intense.

So as not to bore anyone, I'll highlight the changes made.
- 100 dry jelqs
- An extra 200 wet jelqs (for a total of 500), 3 holds at points throughout the wet jelqs.

Iam paying very careful attention to my penis. If it feels like it is starting to hurt I will continue the routine but very lightly.

3 weeks to my first post-PE measurement. I am trying to get myself into the "it's normal not to gain anything in the first month" mindset.

[Beefeater]

Good luck with your modified routine, keep us posted. :)

[wern]

Thanks, will do

[Clockers]

Good luck!

[BigBadBear]

Iam paying very careful attention to my penis. If it feels like it is starting to hurt I will continue the routine but very lightly.
Thats very smart. I've started getting a bit gung-ho about this lately with my routine and I should probably ease up a bit.

3 weeks to my first post-PE measurement. I am trying to get myself into the "it's normal not to gain anything in the first month" mindset.
Smart move. You may have to stay in that mindset for quite a few months even, depending on how quickly you gain. It just takes some people longer than others, you'll probably find out soonish which way it's going to happen for you.

Good luck! :)

['TheBugKahuna']

I have a question, Wernstrum; Why are you upping the intensity?

[BigBadBear]

I have a question, Wernstrum; Why are you upping the intensity?
It's the volume I'd be more worried about here I think.

Higher intensity through tighter grip and slower jelqs would be preferable to doing like 500 Jelqs in my view. Often, the more you do, the lower the quality of each Jelq and the more the quality of each Jelq declines by the end of it as you are just trying to get through them.

[wern]

Bigbadbear and TheBugKahuna:

I am following the workout plan from penisadvantage.com which states 300-500 jelqs per day after the third week (i started on week 2 because I felt comfortable with the exercise). I will reduce it to between 300-400 though. I believeI perform my jelqs reasonably well. I start with 70-80% erection with light and fast jelqs (about .75 seconds per jelq) for the first 50 jelqs (like a mini warmup), then the intensity increases while the erection reduces to about 50% and the jelq time increases to little over 1sec, then towards the end of the set the erection is lower ie 30-40% and the intensity is very strong and jelq time is almost 2secs. I think this targets a nice range of wet-jelq styles. And it means that even if I am doing 400 or 500 jelqs, some of them (about 100) are very light intensity.

['TheBugKahuna']

Interesting. If you believe it is beneficial to you gaining, than by all means keep it up (pun intended).

Keep us posted.

[BigBadBear]

As Bug says, if it works then it works and there's no need to change it. Give it a few months and see how things are coming along, then decide whether or not you want to stick with it. :)

[wern]

thanks guys will do

[MagnumXL]

any gains so far from PA?

[wern]

any gains so far from PA?

I've got 2 weeks till measuring. I can feel more "girthy", although it may just be a psychological thing.

Also, my routine has changed quite a bit and I am reducing on days to either mwf or m,t,th,f

Thanks for asking though

[wern]

April stats:

BPEL - 6.75
EG - 4.75 (mid-shaft)

My penis girth is greatest at the base now, whereas before it was greatest towards the tip (baseball bat shape), but I want to keep measuring girth around the same part of the shaft for comparability.

I am very happy with this.
At the same time I have a problem - the base of my shaft it feels quite numb and I can only get 90-95% erection (considering that I have a very strong PC muscle this is very unusual) but I doubt it is due to PE because I haven't felt any pain throughout my exercises and haven't been doing anything extreme (the most extreme thing I did was a 30second stretch). I haven't gotten much sleep these last 2 weeks and haven't been eating well either + been pretty stressed from work + started taking multivitamins at the same time as L-arg + L-orith.

I only started noticing the numbness this morning. So I will take up to a week off PE, and all supplements, get my body back to its healthy state and continue my previous routine when I return. Now to get a good night's sleep for once.

[Valk]

Is your base still numb?

[wern]

Odd story actually.

The complete "injury" issue is here
http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=356
I have PE'd this morning and everything seemed more or less fine. There wasn't any numbness at all so that was a very good start.

I did extensive research on other sites and stumbled across some bike related ED articles that explained long term injury to the prenium nerve as being the coulprit to numbness in the penis.

The container I have been using for warm ups was usually pressed into that area so that could have caused it. So this morning I used a hotpack instead and I only did one set of 5 second light stretches. Then I did 360 wet jelqs. Seemed fine. I will come to a conclusion about this situation probably within a week assuming that by then everything has stabilised.

thanks for asking though.

[Valk]

Ok. Hope its over now.

[Clockers]

What Valk said. :cool

[wern]

we will see after a coupld more sessions. Everything is feeling fine right now. I just hope my balls don't fall off tomorrow :shock: <- coz that'l be my expression

actually it'l be more like this :roll:

[Valk]

And I will be more like this: :mrgreen :mrgreen :mrgreen :mrgreen :mrgreen

Just kidding mate.
:wink:

[wern]

:twisted:

Hmm I must be doing something right because I am getting bigger in length. Unfortunately not getting bigger in girth :x
I would prefer to gain in girth but a gain is a gain right?

As for the "injury" everything seems to be fine. I sometimes get a little numbness if I to holds though. So I am focusing more on a combination of jelq-ulis/kelqs.

Though the kelqs i am doing are done with a 60-80% erection.


My routine at the moment is:

MWF

warmup + kegels 10min
light stretches 4 min
100 warm-up w/jelqs (60% erection) - light grip, 2 second jelqs
massage penis for blood flow

133 standard w/Kelqs (60-80% erection) - tighter grip, 3-5 second jelqs
massage penis for blood flow
33 erect w/jelqs (90%+ erect) - moderately tight grip but not a pulling grip (making sure not to pull shaft more than lightly) - this is for girth
133 standard w/Kelqs (60-80% erection) - tight grip, 3 second jelqs
warmdown + stretching in shower
The reason I am throwing in some 90%+ jelqs is for girth.

T,Th
In shower: warmup, JAI stretches, light V-stretches, 50 w/jelqs witha couple of my modified kelqs. warmdown

Also kegel throughout the week but not on the weekend.

[Valk]

I see that you have repped me. Do you rep every newbie that comes along, cause I find that its hard to find 20 different people to rep.

[Spike]

Changed it to 8 people.

[Spike]

And according to my info, you've only repped 14 people in total since you got here. :lol:

[Valk]

ONLY!? ONLY! People should be thankful that holy Valk is repping people! :x

[Shane_Bos]

I think ive repped less than that, god im a tight-fisted bastard.

[wern]

your father was a hamster, and yer mother smelled of edlerberries!!!

[Shane_Bos]

Where have i heard that before?

[wern]

I umm just made it up... :mrgreen

[Clockers]

lol

['TheBugKahuna']

I probably just missed it somewhere. But, how long do you hold each stretch for?

[wern]

My stretches exercise goes like this: 5 directions; straight, left, right, up, down

set1: 10 sec each
set2: 15 sec each
set3: 20 sec each
set4: 25-30 sec each
I'll sometimes throw in some V stretching on the straight stretches

But I would attribute length gains to my wet jelqs. Wet jelq with 50-60% erection for nice length gains. It stretches the ligaments in different areas as your OK grip moves up the shaft.

['TheBugKahuna']

Do you Jelq palm up or palm down?

[wern]

mostly palm down (facing away from me). You can get a better grip on the base that way.

['TheBugKahuna']

Thank you for the help, Wern.

[wern]

anytime matey :D

[MagnumXL]

i also do palm down but at the end of my routine i get a 70-80% woody and put it very close to my stomach and jelq palms up. i feel great expansions on the chamber this way, whereas i get more blood in but my erection is still maintained lower. (i know this does not make sense but try it and u will see)

[wern]

I do pulm up jelqs with the penis pointing up as well. It's all good. :cool

[wern]

May 2005
EBPL - 6.875
EG - midshaft - 4.75
I actually was at EBPL - 6.875 about a week after I measured 6.75, but I decided to shift my focus to girth. So basically I haven't gained anything in the last 3 weeks. I don't want to have a long thin dick because women don't like that. If it is too long it hits their cervix and it hurts. So unless I get thicker, what they will feel in their cervix will outweight what they feel in girth. Damn you girth, gain already!!!!!

I need 7 x 5, then 7.5 (or 8) x 5.5

[Valk]

Long intensive jelqs and holds. Do you do those?

[MagnumXL]

u shouldent stop getting length gains over this. keep ur routine going until u stop gaining length then switch to ur girth. milk the length for all its got right now

[wern]

Valk, yes and yes. The holds keep causing bruising so every time I do them I have to rest it for a week, so it doesn't seem to really get me anywhere.

And Magnum, no thanks. I want to increase my size so that I can increase pleasure. So I need to keep a good length/girth ratio. Anyways I will be happy to be 7 inch in length so I am not too concerned. I am a short guy (5'5"), so for my height 7 inches is pretty good (IMO). When I realised how quickly I gained the extra 1/8 inch I actually got worried because there was no corresponding girth increase, so I will stick to girth right now.

[BIGOKE]

Congrats on yer gains buddy. :P I'm so inspired that my dick feels like it wants to grow in envy.He He. I wish!! :mrgreen :mrgreen :mrgreen
I've been xperimenting with different things. maybe for your Girth you should try at 70-85% erection holds halfway up yer shaft and then do dry jelqs from the base 100reps and then rest, get him up again and same hold but from midshaft to the head. this seems to pump it up quite a lot. Remember to loosen the grip and kegel in blood after a few strokes. Like with all PE do it carefully. Although I like this exercise it just makes my routine too long so i went back to the basics. But I will definitely add it back just to see how it goes on an extnded run.
Good on yer. :lol: :lol:

[Shane_Bos]

I wouldnt do holds half way up your shaft. Then, your just forcing the blood to the head of your cock as holding half way up will neglect roughly the bottom 1/2 - 2/3 of it. Seems strange to me.

[wern]

What I sometimes do is just before a Uli, I put a squeezing grip on the head and then I start the Uli so that I trap the blood in the shaft instead of the head. When my dick gets more used to this form of exercise I am sure gains will come.

[BIGOKE]

Wern where u at??? :(

[MagnumXL]

You know what would be funny is if u still kept getting length Wern. ended up with a 12 inch penis doing girth exercises. if this happens by the way, im going to be forced to kill you. :cool

[Clockers]

We never say the words 'Kill-You' on a wonder'ful site as this one.. :lol:

[MagnumXL]

i mean hug u to death :cool

[Clockers]

Oh! Ok thats fine. :D

[wern]

sorry guys, I have been busy with an exam and also I think I had ligament damage from high erection jelqs or strong stretches or something.

It seems like every time I PE I go over the top and damage something so I have to wait a week to recover. So basically I have been PEing once a week for the last 3 weeeks. But I had the exam to do and study for and have been pigging out so bad diet + lots of stress + plus minor injuries + no exercise = (probably) no gains.

Oh yeah, and I have incorporated something into my "repetoire". Cock-ring while wanking. I can handle a lot of pressure because I normally jelq in a shitload of blood into my erections so I decided to do the following:
Incorporate Ulis and erect jelqs into routine, and then in the same day have a wank using a cock ring. The cock ring wanking allows me to put extended pressure in the chambers after stretching them out in the morning. I have been doing this probably through the last month, on average once a week. I have gotten a spot on the lower shaft twice from it. I am hoping these girth exercises pay some dividends.

But overall I am not really concerned as I am pretty happy with my size and I need to focus on more important things like hooking up with a chick! so PE'ing is on the back burner. First order of the day is to start the dieting and exercising. I am pretty sure I will be getting into PEing MWF in 1.5-2 weeks.

[BIGOKE]

Great to have you back :D Good luck with your results and your exam results too.. :twisted:

[wern]

Thanks matey

[wern]

i'm getting excited about using the IR lamp. I have had to sessions and measured my girth a few days after and was almost 5inches.
Also I just found this thread on the old forums (the 'sunken treasure' of CC): http://www.cheekycherry.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=201277&highlight=girth#201277

So it seems to support the view that a constant warmed up PE session helps growth. If this turns out to be true it will be great news for all the hard gainers out there who haven't gained anything yet from PE.

I will probably measure in 2-3 weeks so I think I will be able to see the results better by then. I measured last (before the near 5inch measure) in mid June (all my measurements are made mid-month. Go figure.)

[BIGOKE]

I believe Girth is always what you wanted Matey.Good going. :D

[Bobo]

Bye for now, my friend! I'm leaving CC for now... I'll miss You all. Good luck with everythig, wern! :D

[wern]

:cry:

Take care matey. Good luck in "the real world".

[Bobo]

The "real world" without CC is a bit scary... but I'll try to survive. You too, take care. :wink:

[G-Spot19]

Not a bad theory. I think i may look into that and see how it turns out. I think that i may become a theory or idea reviewer un less the idea or theory is from Oldie. My dick cant take the punishment he gives his. His dick grows cause its scared no too :shock:

[Shane_Bos]

Oldie's somewhat changed since the old CC. He seems alot calmer and subdued now, the flame in his heart has seemingly extinguished and the power in his eyes has faded. What the fuck am i on about? Oldies a bit more pussyish then he used to be, put it that way :mrgreen

[G-Spot19]

Damn! Really. I cant see that. Oldie being even a tad pussyish. Times have changed. :lol:

[wern]

I guess something happens to you when you get close to the 11k post count. I guess it's one of the mysteries of CC.

I haven't done a proper PE session in a while because I have been getting pain on the left side of my shaft base. I thinkit might be ligament damage so I have been taking it easy but it'l take a while to heal because I get erections all the time in my sleep (damn PC muscle) so the ligament has strain put on it. It's just niggling pain, but I prefer to have no pain at all. I beleive it started when I was doing 100% erect jelqs. Note to self - never do 100% erect jelqs again.

[G-Spot19]

Good note. Thats a very dangerous thing to do. Very Risky. If I could find the post about what happened to me. Hell i'll tell you. I was doing intense 100% jelqs and endup up with a sore or blister on my penis. I gave it a couple day and it appeared to be gone. I then began again and figured my penis would adjust over time. As i was doing my jelqing, i saw my hand was red and noticed i had forced blood through the blister and out the skin. :shock:

[wern]

I've read your diary quite a few times before mate, and I remember that post clearly. That's one of the reasons I am taking my time with the healing, although I can't help getting the erections unless I stop training my PC muscle, which I never will (hopefully).

[G-Spot19]

Good. Glad to see someone that determined with kegels. Its hard to remember to work that little bastard out. :D

[wern]

I've been doing it for a long time. I just incorporate it into brushing my teeth every MWF

[G-Spot19]

Good strategy. I used to try before i go to sleep but i'd doze off before i would get done.

[wern]

Here's my exercise (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=280)It has been very effective for me.

[G-Spot19]

Thanks. I think i wil give it a shot.

[Valk]

I've been doing it for a long time. I just incorporate it into brushing my teeth every MWF

I think you should brush more often. :)

[wern]

hehehe well I do brush more extensively when doing kegels, because I brush for longer. But its all good.

[Valk]

So your tuna smell goes both ways? :mrgreen

[wern]

You have been obsessing about it this whole time Valk? Shucks:puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:

[Shane_Bos]

You do love that emoticon dont you :puke:

[wern]

I am a pretty sarcastic guy so I use it mostly for my own entertainment.

Ie. I like dildos :puke:

[Shane_Bos]

Im a sarcastic dude too. I also like dildos. Hey me and you should hook up :wink:

[wern]

wait, was that sarcasm?


:mrgreen

[Shane_Bos]

Hang on, was that sarcasm?

[wern]

wait, wait, was that sarcasm??

bloody sarcasm

[Shane_Bos]

Haha! Cant get enough of the stuff!

[BIGOKE]

Im a sarcastic dude too. I also like dildos. Hey me and you should hook up :wink:
You guys like em inside or outside?? :?

[G-Spot19]

Either way it disturbs me :shock:

[wern]

the curse of the gay posts has struck my diary. WHY!!!!

[Shane_Bos]

It was inevitable really but to try and restore some straightness...

Bigoke, i like dildos when one is being shared by 2 fit lesbian women, mmmmm :mrgreen

[G-Spot19]

:P :P :P :P :P :P
Me too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[wern]

lesbians + dildos = droooool

[BIGOKE]

When I grow up I wanna be a hot lesbians dildo. :twisted:

[G-Spot19]

Now thats a dream to shoot for!!!! :D

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Wern, is it ok to do kegels during hot wrap (warm up). If so could you do it for warm down aswell?

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

And also I thought you are suppose to do holds AFTER you have jelqed ?? :roll:

[wern]

You can do kegels at any time.
Warmup and warmdown is a good time to do them because you reduce your routine time by doing more than one exercise at once.

Here's my current routine:

5 mins steam warmup (hotpack lightly sprayed with water)
infront of my IR lamp -
6mins: warmup stretches, then V-stretches: 2 x left,right,up,down,forward 30secs V-stretches
2mins: 50 light jelqs - 40-60%, 2seconds each
4mins: 50 medium jelqs - 50-70%, 3-5 seconds each
20mins: 4 x (30sec Hold/Uli + 50 kelqs - 60-80% 3-5 seconds each)
Jump in the shower for 5-10min warmdown
Total time (excluding shower at the end): 37mins

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Oh I see, how come you do holds for SOOO LONG? And Jelq so little time wise? :roll:

[wern]

I do 4 holds for a total of 4 minutes, and I do 22minutes of jelqs. A kelq is a jelq involving kegels.

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

So a kelq is when you are kegelling and jelqing?

[Anthrax]

It's one of Oldie's INTENSE exercises... You can hurt yourself trying to do it the way Oldie does it... I believe wern does his at a lower erection percentage then Oldie suggested, but nevertheless it is very advanced, so there's no need for you to use it yet...


Here's the link (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=118) to it, by the way...

[wern]

when using an IR lamp your skin becomes more plyable. So at a 70-80% erection it's not that bad, as long as you know what you're doing.


I had the most amazing session last night with kelqs and the IR lamp. Good times were had. :cool

[Anthrax]

I'm waiting for mine to be shipped... I can't wait to use it, I won't have to leave my room to PE...

[wern]

Good luck with it, you won't be dissapointed (I hope :puke: )

[G-Spot19]

I'm waiting for mine to be shipped... I can't wait to use it, I won't have to leave my room to PE...


I noticed you bought the Westinghouse one. :wink:

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Oh OH! You guys please describe to me WTF! a IR LAmp is, I heard everyone talking and getting so hyped about it and me?!?!?! I dun even know wtf it is????? A picture would be nice :D

[wern]

I am doing KL Stretch every weekday morning during my showers. Besides that I am doing stretching in my MWF routine.


Tmac, here's some IR Lamp Links:
Got a IR Lamp today (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=719&highlight=infrared)
got my ir lamp today (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=1033&highlight=infrared)
Infrared Lamps (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=679&highlight=infrared)
Anyone get an IR lamp yet? (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=1005&highlight=infrared)

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Thanks wern but no pictures so it's kinda hard to know wtf it is??? :roll: ANyway is it something to warm your dick up to be ready for PE???? :roll:

[wern]

updated this: got my ir lamp today (http://www.cheekycherry.com/ccforums/showthread.php?t=1033&highlight=infrared)

check the last post

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

OH I see so it's a light bulb that releases heat waves to keep you warm, I dunno how that is as effective as warming up your dick in water though and wrap it with a towel coz that actually makes contact with the penis skin which makes the tissue soft :roll:

[wern]

Read all the threads. Your question and the answers are there

[soserious]

I gotta say Wern you are a really good provider of all-round knowledge and thoughts and do well to help the newbies.
Good job.

ss

[wern]

Thanks matey. I do a lot of research. I believe that focussing on your penis aids in growth, because your body tends to divert resources to the areas that your attention rests on. That is one of the functions of pain - it hurts so 1. you know not to move it, and 2. you place your attention on it due to the pain, and then your brain diverts resources to it.

[ThirdLeg]

Thanks matey. I do a lot of research. I believe that focussing on your penis aids in growth, because your body tends to divert resources to the areas that your attention rests on. That is one of the functions of pain - it hurts so 1. you know not to move it, and 2. you place your attention on it due to the pain, and then your brain diverts resources to it.

Thats very interesting I didnt really think about pain that way till now. Thats 2 things ive learned today im going to be a genius by tommorrow :) .

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Yep you seem to know everything wern, if I have my own PE site/forums I would hire you :wink: and G-spot :D

[Anthrax]

And if I had my own penis enlargement forum, I would ban you from it before you had a chance to advertise yours...

[wern]

I don't do this for money and there are lots of people that know much more than I do.

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

I don't do this for money and there are lots of people that know much more than I do.

And he is a nice guy :D Wern I'm going to Sydney next year for business trip and for holiday. I've been to sydney 19 times now in my life and lived there for 2 years, we should meet up someday, lol :D

[wern]

People meeting from a penis enlargment website. That'd be something new. Only if you bring your sister :mrgreen

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

People meeting from a penis enlargment website. That'd be something new. Only if you bring your sister :mrgreen

lol, and you bring your mum? :P :lol: jks :wink:

[wern]

:lol: :lol:

[dividethehate165]

wern you need to update this biotch

Ive been reading your old journal too

[Superbeast]

lol, and you bring your mum? :P :lol: jks :wink:

MILF MILF MILF.

Just kidding :wink:

[wern]

wern you need to update this biotch

Ive been reading your old journal too

I haven't made any proper measurements in a while, but for the record I haven't gained. Or I have gained minimally. I have barely being PE'ing even once per week on average. Life is too hectic and I am bedding someone and she seems to be quite satisfied so considering all that I am putting PE on the backburner. Thanks for asking though

[Valk]

Only one?

[wern]

I don't have time for anything else.

[Valk]

What are you studying? And what is the reason you do this study?

[BIGOKE]

I like the way you said you're "bedding someone". So darn eloquent. It sounds like you plantin flowers. :lol:

[wern]

What are you studying? And what is the reason you do this study?

An accounting course that allows me to be titled as a CPA (certified practising accountant) (http://www.cpaaustralia.com.au/cps/rde/xchg/SID-3F57FEDF-1C9B83A4/cpa/hs.xsl/1038_4025_ENA_HTML.htm). To be eligible to enter this course you have to have an accredited university degree majoring in accounting. Once I become a CPA I become a bona fide professional accountant. Then I do another course that takes 6 months and I attain a public practice certificate which is pretty much the most distinguished level of accounting professionally - it allows you to operate your own accounting firm to service the public.
The reason I am studying this course is that it furthers my career in accounting by furthering my qualifications.

And Bigoke.. I may use eloquent pronounciation but when I am actually bedding this flower, eloguence is lost as petals quiver under ecstacy's breath. LOL

[Spike]

I bet you get fed up of people doing the Monty Python Accountant sketch when you mention your profession? :lol:

[wern]

I don't think I've seen it :x

Don't tell me I have to look through all their episodes.!!! Can you tell me which episode it's in guvnah?

[Spike]

I'll go and find out. (cost you a shell corporation with nominee directors).

[wern]

How about I get you one of those moon shares?

[Valk]

An accounting course that allows me to be titled as a CPA (certified practising accountant) (http://www.cpaaustralia.com.au/cps/rde/xchg/SID-3F57FEDF-1C9B83A4/cpa/hs.xsl/1038_4025_ENA_HTML.htm). To be eligible to enter this course you have to have an accredited university degree majoring in accounting. Once I become a CPA I become a bona fide professional accountant. Then I do another course that takes 6 months and I attain a public practice certificate which is pretty much the most distinguished level of accounting professionally - it allows you to operate your own accounting firm to service the public.
The reason I am studying this course is that it furthers my career in accounting by furthering my qualifications.



I already thought you had your own acounting firm? You're a entrepeneur right?

[wern]

I manage an accounting firm, I don't own my own. I believe I have the experience to run my own firm, but not the academic qualifications that will allow John Smith and Jane Doe to trust me.

[BIGOKE]

I manage an accounting firm, I don't own my own. I believe I have the experience to run my own firm, but not the academic qualifications that will allow John Smith and Jane Doe to trust me.
I've used those names before at sleazy hotels.. :twisted: Definitely not trustworthy.. :mrgreen

[wern]

We've got clients called John Smith. No Jane Does though :lol:

[wern]

I know I have been away for a long time, and my apologies go out to all of you for not explaining my leave to you.
There hasn't been any reason except the fact that I have been busy at work, and have been a bit of a recluse as well.
So again, my apologies.

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Good to hear your back and well buddy :wink:

[Axlerod]

Here's one for you:

What's the best contraception for an accountant

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....their job.

[wern]

:x:x :x :x

[G-Spot19]

I know I have been away for a long time, and my apologies go out to all of you for not explaining my leave to you.
There hasn't been any reason except the fact that I have been busy at work, and have been a bit of a recluse as well.
So again, my apologies.
No need to apologize. Been there my friend. Welcome back. We missed ya

[wern]

Right back at ya buddy. Though I may be gone soon again :x

[wern]

I am going to start PE'ing again. Or at least give it a good shot. Time and moderation during exercises are my only enemies.

I will work on girth.

Fatter penis here I come :D

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

How long have you been off for?

[wern]

Ages. At least a year. I kept going overboard with the exercises and injurying myself. I have a few scars to show for it as a result :x , but there's no way a woman would ever notice them unless she was a doctor and inspecting my dick.

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

Oh yep, your gains still there? Or have some disappeared since you've been out for sooo long.

[wern]

I havent taken any measurements yet. I only did my first exercise today. I'll measure in a week. I don';t expect to gain anything this week because my routine is ultra newbie

[The Big Banana]

Go you good thing. Good luck, hope the gains fairy gives you girth this time around.

Whats your ultra newbie routine?

[Tmac 1 LeBron 23]

TBB, you've gain! Nice job hitting the 200mm mark!

The routine must be Oldie's newbie routine.

[wern]

Go you good thing. Good luck, hope the gains fairy gives you girth this time around.

Whats your ultra newbie routine?

Basically it is this:
"Stretch" for 5-10 seconds in every direction once or twice, but these stretches are pretty much just stretching the dick to 60-90% of its length, just to "wake it up" and reduce chances of injury.

Then I do 100-150 jelqs, but again, the erection is a low to average level, ie 50-75%. I start with 50% for the first 50 jelqs, then go up slowly until 100-150 at which point I am jelqing around 75%.

If I get hardons afterwards, they feel very full, like I have done the right thing :mrgreen

If the gains fairy pays me a visit I'll bottle her up and extract her DNA for cloning.

[wern]

TBB, you've gain! Nice job hitting the 200mm mark!

The routine must be Oldie's newbie routine.

Who is Oldie?

[Spike]

Wouldn't the gains fairy take your gains and leave you $1 under your pillow? :lol:

[wern]

I'd rather she take $1 and give me gains. Maybe I can trick her.

[Spike]

Don't wish for the Gains Genie - he looks gay and probably leave something up your rectum while you sleep. :lol:

[wern]

But will I gain????